Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation
What’s the difference?
Historically, discussions about gender and sexuality have been grouped together in social, medical and academic contexts. Today, media and cultural stereotypes often associate certain gender expressions with specific sexual orientations generating misleading tropes and leaving their audience with an incomplete understanding of the differences between gender identity and sexual orientation.
The LGBTQI+ community encompasses both gender-diverse (for example transgender, nonbinary, genderqueer) and sexuality-based identities (for example, lesbian, gay, bisexual). Words like “queer” can also be used to describe both gender diversity and sexual orientation. This can also blur the differences between these identities for those unfamiliar with the distinctions.
Distinctions
Put simply, gender identity is about who you are, in terms of your gender. One’s internal sense of gender may or may not align with the sex one was assigned at birth.
By contrast, sexual orientation is about who you are attracted to. It is a relational concept which is concerned with one’s romantic, emotional and sexual attraction to others.
Whilst gender identity and sexual orientation are different, they intersect for many individuals.
Are you questioning your gender identity or sexual identity/orientation?
If you are experiencing confusion, or questioning your sexual orientation or gender identity, it’s important to treat yourself with self-compassion, patience and openness. Questioning your identity is a courageous act of self-discovery and you don’t need to have all the answers right away. Your identity may evolve or shift over time and it is important to take time for self-reflection and consider your feelings, preferences and experiences.
Practical steps you can take to help navigate this journey include:
· Explore Resources and Communities Engaging with content from LGBTQI+ creators or professionals can help you learn about different identities and experiences which you may find resonate. There are also online forums and local group meetings in many countries.
· Experiment in Safe Ways If it feels comfortable, you can try exploring your identity in safe environments. For example. LGBTQI+ events and spaces can offer the chance to explore changing clothing, hairstyles or pronouns to see what feels authentic and allows you to freely express yourself.
· Avoid Pressure to “Come Out” Coming out is a deeply personal choice and it is important to focus on understanding and accepting yourself. Internalised prejudice may be deeply ingrained and understanding one’s own sexual orientation or gender identity often takes time.
· Remember you are not alone Many people go through periods of questioning and self-discovery and it’s a natural part of understanding your authentic self.
· Seek Professional Support LGBTQI+ affirming therapists are trained to help you process your emotions, wherever your journey may take you. They are also ideally placed to assist you if you are struggling with feelings of shame or fear, particularly if you do not have people in your life that you feel you can trust to listen to your feelings without judgement.
If you would like to discuss your gender identity or your sexual orientation, Unicorn Care provides a safe, non-judgmental space to explore any issues, concerns or questions.